psha... and no.

I'd rather die of exhaustion and overworking myself than sit here and be. Don't get me wrong, sitting and just being sounds like the most beautiful idea in the world right now... just not here. Even if I try to just be, for even just a moment, i'm bugged by people telling me to get my act, my life together... then when I try, they tell me not to do what I'm doing... that's not the life I want. But when I do what they want a) i'm unhappy and unsettled, and b) they still rag when it doesn't work the way they wanted. And maybe... what I really need to do right now to get myself together, is to be. The idea of being a gypsy/nomad appeals to me sooo much. Just being somewhere different every week, being the "hands" of Christ. But when I reveal that want, that desire, I'm told I'm an idiot, and selfish, and unwise and immature. Will I do what I think is best according to what the bible says? yes. Will I follow the LORD anywhere? yes. Will I let negative people hold me back from that? no. All I want to do is to love stupidly (stupidly, as in the way God loves us) with God's love, and to be free to serve on any opportunity. I don't know what that looks like yet, but I refuse to wait until March to figure it out. I'll figure it out after Chicago... Without the influence of the negative.

Loving Stupidly,
Alanna Dorene Kraft